A Fall From Space (The Latest 'Fallout' From That Wacky Wayward Satellite)

If a satellite falls from the sky and no one is around to hear or see it, should we care? Of course we care. This is an obituary for the latest satellite to fall to earth. It did have a name. It was UARS (Upper Atmosphere Research Satellite) and its purpose when launched many years ago was to research chemicals in the earth’s upper atmosphere. It really was a celebrity. How many other objects do you know that grab the attention of the world?

It even had at least two separate Facebook accounts with postings worldwide in several languages. Like all celebrities, its every movement was both reported and joked about but then like so many before, it soon crashed and burned. By late Saturday night the number of new “tweets” had dwindle to a mere forty … soon to be forgotten … or maybe not.

When NASA launched it over 20 years ago, what they didn’t plan on was it becoming an overnight (if temporary) sensation while on its last legs so to speak. (Talk about a career revival!) Approximately 24 hours after its demise, there were over 1000 videos on YouTube about it. Some of them contained incredible images, although not authenticated by NASA (even satellites can be photoshopped).

The videos are from all over the world but many will no doubt prove to be the product of some people’s overactive imagination … if not their own personal creation. It is apparent that this was a most endearing “piece of junk” that captured the hearts and minds of many nations … Sounds more like a movie about a dog or ET than a large hunk of metal.

 It crashed sometime between 11:23pm Friday (September 23) night and 1:09am Saturday (September 24) morning and caused fewer ripples than the crash of the stock market … although there were some water ripples since it supposedly crashed somewhere in the West Pacific Ocean. NASA as of the moment of this typing hasn’t quite figured out exactly where it fell to earth.

It was the last of its kind because all future United States satellites will have a controlled reentry system. When UARS was designed, “no human casualty reentry risk limits” existed. Roughly translated this means that no one figured what was an acceptable number of humans to be clobbered by the fallout. (I guess risk management people are familiar with the concept ) However the risk to human life was always extremely small. NASA states that there have been no confirmed reports of any personal injury or significant property damage caused by reentering space objects since the start of the space program in the 1950s.

But it doesn’t take a rocket scientist (or in this case maybe it does take one) to figure out that if a 300 pound piece of junk flying through the air hits you, not much evidence would be left. For this particular satellite, according to NASA’s UARS Casualty Risk Assessment Report, the risk of human casualty was 1 in 3200. Other news reports elaborated on this calculation stating that because the earth’s population is 7 billion, the chance of any one person (like you or me) getting hit was more like 1 in 22 trillion … (sounds more like our national debt.) Although these odds sound better, I don’t know who’s doing the math. Certainly not me … I’m bad in math …Used to sink down in my chair as low as I could get before hitting the floor so I wouldn’t get “called on” to answer questions in math class.

NASA assured the public that the limited amount of space junk that does survive reentry and heads towards earth, will be pieces that either fall into the ocean or fall into sparsely populated areas like “Siberia, the Australian Outback or the Canadian Tundra” … (What I’d like to know is, if there was no controlled reentry process at the time, how do the scientists figure that UARS or other similar space junk is probably going to wind up in one of these locations? And how do the people who live in those “sparsely populated areas” feel about the casualty risk assessment report? I’m guessing NASA is not too popular with them.)

Anyway, now NASA and many of the world’s foreign space agencies seek to “limit human casualty risks from reentering space objects to less than 1 in 10,000.” I guess they might just succeed since much of our space program is now “up in the air” (how ironic is that phrase?) due to funding.

This we know for sure … after 20 years and 9 days, UARS’s came down. It had run out of gas.

The end of UARS doesn’t mean the end of space junk. There are other pieces
falling to earth all the time. This is NASA’s reply when asked how much orbital debris is currently in the earth’s orbit, “Approximately 19,000 objects larger than 10 cm are known to exist. The estimated population of particles between 1 and 10 cm in diameter is approximately 500,000. The number of particles smaller than 1 cm probably exceeds tens of millions” (Not sure what this means … metrics is part of math and these centimeters, kilometers, etc are terms I have to Google. In fact, I’m still having trouble with the “old system”.

Couldn’t tell you right now how many quarts are in a gallon. ) “On average, one non-functional spacecraft, launch vehicle orbital stage, or other piece of cataloged debris has fallen back to earth every day for more than 40 years” but most do not survive the intense reentry process.”

So this is a final goodbye to just one special piece of junk that left its mark on us … UARS is gone but not forgotten. With its debris trail expected to be 500 miles and pieces ranging from ten to 300 pounds we’ll possibly be picking up after it for many years to come especially since it probably has broken up into many pieces but … a word of warning. If you should one day happen to be taking a stroll along the beach or using a metal detector to treasure hunt, you might just find piece of UARS. Be careful.

According to a recent Tweet by a NASA rep, “Any pieces of UARS found are the property of the country that made it. You’ll have to give ‘em back to the U.S.” That’s a real quote. It’s not “finders keepers, losers weepers” with them. NASA’s instructions say if you should find something that you think may be a part of UARS, to contact local law enforcement officials. Apparently this is for both safety and legal issues.

Well first of all, I don’t know about you, but I usually don’t walk (or swim) looking for junk … There’s enough of that stuff in the house according to my husband. Secondly, I don’t think I’d recognize space junk if it fell on my head … not that I’d survive that anyway. Besides, can you imagine the call to the police … ? “Officer, I have a piece of junk that I’d like removed from my property.” I think they would call another department to remove me from the property … thinking that I was the one who was “spaced out”.

I suspect though that if found, most people will not turn in their discovered pieces. I wouldn’t be surprised if you found space junk showing up on EBay … That’s how a lot of people get rid of their junk. You know what they say, “One man’s space junk is another man’s treasure” … I myself would keep it as long as it’s not radioactive or something. (I’d test it in the dark first.

My motto would be “If It Glows, It Goes.”) Yard sales are another place you may want to check out if looking to buy space junk. Instead of “Made in Japan” look for the “An Original NASA Creation” label. Not too much says “Made in the USA” today so it would show the world that this country still manufactures some things.

Here’s a suggestion. In the future, NASA should stamp “Property of NASA … do not remove under penalty of law” on all future flying objects. Sound familiar? Think mattress tags. I have never removed a tag from a mattress in my life for fear of being incarcerated. I can just hear the jail conversation now, “What are you in for?” “Mattress tag removal … I didn’t mean to but I just got caught up in the moment and tore it off. I tried to reattach it but they said it was too late for that.” If it’s good enough for Sealy Posturepedic, it should be good enough for NASA. Fewer people would be tempted to sell or keep the objects.

Most of us will not have a piece of UARS to remember it by and didn’t see its final descent that night. If you didn’t get a chance to say goodbye, you can periodically check the NASA website, www.nasa.gov to see if they have posted an authentic verifiable video yet. As of Sunday morning September 25, there was still no video on this site. In fact, there was still no official answer to the question of exactly where UARS landed. However interest is again mounting. There were over 1,700,000 Google returns for the search term “UARS”, over 1600 YouTube videos, and the number of new Tweets is climbing yet again.

There are some reporting that we may never know the exact location of UARS’s final resting place. It could remain a mystery like one of those other “famous fliers … Amelia Earhart.” That perhaps would be a more fitting memorial for it (seems like we should call UARS either a “he” or a “she”. To say, “it” sounds so impersonal). That way, any person at any location in the world could at least think that they had found a piece of UARS … The world just might better a better place with a little less science and a little more mystery and “magic”. 

 “UARS … (Don’t know the correct pronunciation but I’d like to think it’s phonetically pronounced like “you ours”) … The people’s satellite ... What an impact you had” … It’s a solemn time but I think UARS would laugh at that … (Remember, I do talk to appliances and others out there have told me they do too).

One word of advice, if you decide to go barefoot, you may want to opt for sandals instead. At the very least make sure your tetanus shots are up to date. You never know what kind of piece of exotic metal you might step on. It just might be something that’s from “out of this world”.